72 hours & I still cannot cope.
Rewinding back since maybe the month of October death had struck and stuck around from the wide range of known celebrities to the inner circle of my personal friends and family.
There would be some that were kind of on the back of your mind like you knew they were coming though still somber nonetheless. But the amount of which were sudden. The ones that made time stand still for a moment because "What?!?? and How?!??" Those ones gave me anxiety.
They were happening a little too often in the span of 3-4 months for me to ever relax. It was an aunt, a son, a friend, someone famous, a grandparent, another friend, someone famous again. At a point I was asking how many reminders of this short and painfully unpredictable life DID WE NEED?
People were less than 40 with cardiac complications..why? Car accidents claiming those only trying to get to work WHY?? How many of those did we actually need to be thrown at us at one time? How could we tell the universe to take it easy and just stop... that we get it?
Then here comes January 26, 2020. Literally in the middle of the night before, I remember shooting an angry tweet fed up with the constant "we have time" chanters. Because nothing made sense to me. Unexpected/sudden death just chewing at my nerves. Through the week I was also retweeting an interestingly high volume of Kobe related content that happened to cross the timeline. It wasn't weird because it was Kobe. Looking back though...
No more than two hours after church that Sunday I was reading RIP KOBE on my phone. Following the story piece by piece uncovering this tragedy... it was then RIP 13 YEAR OLD GIANNA who was with him 💔more time passes... RIP TO THE SEVEN OTHER PEOPLE ALL "HELICOPTER-POOLING" TO THE SAME DESTINATION.
RIP JOHN, KERI & ALYSSA ALTOBELLI
RIP SARAH & PAYTON CHESTER
RIP CHRISTINA MAUSER
RIP ARA ZOBAYAN
Time for sure stood still then. Again. How many more examples?
In a city still recovering from the loss of someone prominent in a culture where these celebrities connected us... gave a sense of community. Motivation. They inspired our hustle, our drive, our journey, our marathon. It's a shame when their lives feel taken prematurely. It's harder to swallow and stomach that way.
At what point will it be enough? And when can someone take a breather before the next one?
I'm slowly coming to terms entering the new year and the decade where my career will take off and eventually I'll start having my own family (by the grace of God). My own "grown-ups" will then start getting older and inevitably people will be expected to pass. That's just something that happens. But what's the margin left for the unexpected/sudden losses? Seems to be expanding and this is what stresses me out.
Sure it is what it is at the end of the day. Life is short and you've GOT TO hold your loved ones close. Love on your people continuously because you never know. All the quotes and all the feels.
I'd just like a moment to recover. Because October. November. December. January.. it's been a revolving door back to the same "we were just talking... I just saw you (insert time period of no longer than a day) ago" "every thing was just fine"
These sudden deaths. They drain.
PS.
Things get so icky when it comes to disasters such as this one heavily covered by the media.
To all those blaming any one person in particular here. Think about your opinions first and how both unnecessary and extremely insensitive they are.
Here's some reality. Every individual entered that helicopter in the morning with a choice to find a different mode of transportation or speak up about weather concerns for safety. They made their decision.
We do the same getting on airplanes, trains, buses, and cabs. Though we're relinquishing our control we do so out of choice.
By the grace of God, you get from point A to point B with absolutely no issue. Planes crash, helicopters crash, trains crash, limos crash, buses crash, cars crash.
The hurtful judgements and comments I've seen placing blame are disgusting. The plan was to enjoy a day with other families and watch their children play basketball. That's it.
Send love not hate. Everyone in this situation has family who needs to be comforted and respected. Many lives changed that day in an instant. We always want answers and for things to be black and white. Sometimes they're not.
PS. (2)
Clout chasing cretins, fake survivor sympathizers, and just loud and wrong no ounce of human decency lowlifes take a lap on this one. Do something else with your time. Because the world doesn't need to experience any of it.
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